Friday, August 23, 2013

just feel your heart fall


your hopes are raised
feelings
thoughts
bubbling up inside of you
as you eagerly await it
it's coming closer
you're almost there
to this thing
that you have been
waiting for
all this time
you can't wait
you've been waiting
all this time
and now
it's finally
here
and you just
can't wait
as you hurry
to get to it
hurry to get
 everything else
done
so you can check it
and see what happened
and see if all your hopes
and dreams
and wishes
came true

and you do
and your face
reveals your excitement
bright and happy
eyes alight
mouth curved
as if too scared
to give a smile
but too happy
to keep it straight
and you're there
but suddenly
all your hopes
and dreams
and wishes
come crashing
to the ground
falling
in a heap
as you see
that everything you hoped
and dreamed
and wished
hadn't come true
it hadn't come out
like you had excepted
and you just felt
your heart fall
down
down
down
down into the dark abyss
of insecurity
fear
worry
frustration
you just can't
understand
but it's too late--
you just felt your heart fall

sometimes
our hopes
our dreams
our wishes
are too high
for what we wanted
for what we thought
and it pains us
as we walk down
a quiet dark place
tears falling down our cheeks
splashing on the ground
i curl up in a ball
hugging my knees
wondering
"where did i go wrong?"
"what did i ever do
to deserve this?"
it doesn't seem
fair
that others
get called
wonderful
beautiful
amazing
perfect
and that me
and everyone else
is left
in the dust
if they had done
the same thing i had just done
they would have been
called
wonderful
beautiful
amazing
perfect
but me?
i'm forgotten
ignored
people don't care
they don't care
that my heart
just fell

just feel your heart fall
we think it's the end of the
world
what we don't
know
is that there
is a life
out there
made just for us
there is a life
out there
that no one else
except us
can live
there are lives
that we will touch
that no one else
will never touch
there are people
out there
that no one else
except us
change help change
that are things
out there
that no one else
except us
can do
there is
and adventure
waiting
for all of us
each of our adventures
are different
we will each meet
different characters
and all of them
will react differently
to us
then to the next person
there is something
wonderful
beautiful
amazing
perfect
out there
and you know
what that is?
it's me
it's you
it's everyone
everyone
is special
and wonderful
and beautiful
and amazing
and, if they're following Christ,
they will
be made
perfect
pErFeCt
PeRfEcT
perfect

and no one else
can ever
ever
ever
ever
take that way from us
not unless
we let them
so why
are you letting them?
so why
am i letting them?
i feel my heart fall
but that doesn't mean
that Someone greater
Someone better
Someone more amazing
Someone more wonderful
Someone more beautiful
Someone more perfect
The Perfect
won't reach down
and pick me back
up again

2 comments:

  1. Anna. That's beautiful. And knowing some things you are going through now, I know that may not be all fiction. You don't have to publish this, but I know you are reading it, and that is enough. I am always here for you, early in the morning, late at night, and if you need to talk, I'm here! I have been praying for you daily!

    ReplyDelete

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