Thursday, September 6, 2012

Noah's House Gets Wrecked

Dear Reader,

Yeah, so I guessed that it was time for another from awesome me (haha). Yep, it's Jessie!!! So, just to say, I heard that Storyteller had a fire by her place. (well, two, actually......) I also heard that they're pretty much contained!!!! She wanted me to personally thank everyone who prayed for her.

So, um, THANKS!!!!

OK, so what am I going to talk about today?

Like there's any choice!! What just happened to me!!!!

OK, into story mode....

So I was walking down the hallway when all of a sudden Noah caught up with me. He didn't say anything and was walking cryptically quietly down the hallway with me. I was about to turn and yell at him "OK, so what on earth is going on?!" when he turned on me and announced,

"OK, Jessie, hear me out before you say no."

I frowned, suspicious. "OK. So what's the scoop? And why on earth are you acting so weird? Man, you'd think I'd like become an alien or something......"

"OK." Noah took a deep breath. "Jessie, the guys and I..."

"Wait." I held up my hands. "What 'guys'?"

"The football team," he answered, like "duh, Jessie, what other kind of 'guys' are there for me??".


"So, anyway, we were wondering if you would be willing to be the mascot at a party," he blurted.

OK, so our team is called the Spartans. Our colors are black and maroon. Our mascot is this really heavy outfit with a felt Spartan hat and Spartan clothes that I'd been told a million times felt like you were wearing a hundred pounds of wool during the middle of summer.

"You've got to be joking!" I cried. "And what kind of party would you want me to be a mascot at?! Are you out of your mind?!"

"Oh, come on, Jessie!" he cried. His eyes begged. "Please?"

"What party?" I demanded.

"Well...." Noah trailed off. "Our Middle School football team went and invited Norwich's over for a party."

 Norwich. Man, I hated those peoples' guts!! They were like beasts at everything and had been our rivals since God had spoke man into being (OK, so probably not that early, but you see my point).

I gave him a look. "And you're wanting me to dress up as your mascot? For the party? What am I even supposed to DO?"

"Just be a good sport and represent our team," Noah said. "It'll be really easy."

"Why on earth do you guys need a mascot?" I demanded.

"Because Norwich is going to have their's there!" cried Noah.

Either way, I found myself driving up to Noah's house, the place of the party, dressed in a Spartan suit. Well, I was definitely the shortest Spartan ever to be alive.

"Bye, Jessie!" Mom yelled out the window after me, driving off down the street. Bye bye, getaway. Stink.

I was about to get my courage to go inside when the door burst open and the whole team, led by Noah, rushed out to greet me.

Apparently, Noah had told the name of the person inside (me) because everybody was like, "Jessie!" "Thanks so much, Jessie!" "Are you OK in there, Jessie?" "Come on in, Jessie!" "We're just about to eat, Jessie!" "I think the Norwich team's about here, Jessie!"

"Come on!" Noah grabbed my arm and the whole team hauled me inside.

Inside Noah's house looked, as always, like the inside of Hobby Lobby. I was more than surprised that his mother had allowed him to have a party here with who knew how many middle schoolers. I definitely wouldn't have signed up for it. Yet I was here. Stink.

"They here!" shrieked one of the boys who'd been watching the door. "The bus is just getting parked! Hey! There's that jerk quarterback Mansville!"

"Jessie," hissed Noah, "just pretend you're a mascot and disguise your voice to sound like Tony."

"Tony?" I frowned.

"Yeah," He whispered. "Like that tiger dude? Kellogs?"

I was still giving him a strange look when we ran off to the door with the rest of the boys. The door burst open and there was a whole group of boys. Unlike our team, they were all dressed in casual clothes (not like jerseys). In front of them was  a stern man with salt and pepper hair.

"Is this the Darcy residence?!" shouted the man, though, really, it was unnecessary.

"Yep!" cried Noah. "Welcome to Dayton!"

All of the Norwich kids came in unwillingly. Tensions were high. I saw the mascot, and noticed that whoever it was was like two feet taller than me. Ugh.

The boys were playing some games when all of a sudden there was really loud shouting and yelling. I'd been standing quietly by the wall, but since nobody was doing anything, I sighed and threw off the mascot head and ran over there.

"What is your problem?" I hissed to the two boys. "This is a party! For goodness sakes, stop acting like two year olds!"

"It's a girl!" cried one of the boys (he must've been a Norwich boy, because I didn't know he was).

"Of course she's a girl!" cried the other, a boy by the name of Jason Mayberry.

"So you had to get a girl to do it because no real man would ever help you wimps out?" sneered the other boy.

Boy, those are fightin' words.

No truer words than those.

Jason glared and then threw a punch, catching the kid right on the jaw. Another Norwich boy saw it and was like, "Hey!" then he punched Jason.

And so started the most wrecked wrecking of Noah Darcy's house. Kids grabbed pillows and threw them; they punched each other; they hit each other; they almost hit Noah's mother! They threw her vases, they threw her plates, they threw the bananas, they threw the dates! They punched and bit and pinched and screamed, and Noah's mother had them deemed, horrible children, evil sprites, and I was like the only light.

OK, sorry for the poem.

When they finally broke up the fight, all of the Norwich kids were hauled back off to Norwich and all of the Dayton kids were taken home by my mother.

Just to say, I never threw a punch.

And Noah? I don't know. But I think he's going to have a long talk with his parents..... ;)




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